2012 in Review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

600 people reached the top of Mt. Everest in 2012. This blog got about 2,500 views in 2012. If every person who reached the top of Mt. Everest viewed this blog, it would have taken 4 years to get that many views.

Click here to see the complete report.

A Decent Pair

Photo Credit: www.etsy.com

Photo Credit: http://www.etsy.com

Some people get freaked out by midgets, or creeps that follow you around in Macy’s or oddly long toes, etc. We all have things that give us the creeps! I realized on Saturday night that the tradition of Santa-con scares the s**t out of me.  I am so terrified of all those weird Santas, awkward elves, and life size dradles walking around New York City.  I had the unfortunate experience of going out Saturday night and socializing amongst all of these Santas.  The Santas were wackos yet the night was fun.  We went to Ace Bar in Alphabet City.  Not the classiest joint I have ever stepped foot in but it was good enough I suppose.  While I was there I got to thinking about how men can go many different directions with winter accessories.  And I could write forever about said directions, but today I want to discuss

MITTENS ON MEN

Well, I am sure you know what is coming next.  Attention all men: NEVER wear mittens.  This is not an “if and or but” subject.  The answer is always no after the age of 8 unless you work at the North Pole making toys all year long.  It does not matter if you are making your way down the slopes, building a snowman with junior, or if your 13 year old niece  Zoe made you mittens in her home economics class, the answer is always no!  If you are a grown man who wears mittens you may as well have a sign hanging from your neck that says, “My mommy breast-fed me way too long, I still suck my thumb at night in secret, my three cats are my best friends, I’m a virgin and I wear a onesie every night to bed.” (Stay tuned for a post about grown men wearing onesies)  There are just some aspects of fashion that you can’t make work.  Plus, like I always write you wouldn’t want to run into your boss, crush or future in-laws wearing mittens would you?  Every grown man who lives in a climate where the temperature will drop below 50 at some point during the year should own at least one pair of decent leather gloves.  So, if you do not, then get yourself over to a Cole Haan, Coach, or even an Eddie Bauer for crying out loud and pick yourself up a pair.  Try and purchase a pair with a cashmere lining, they are the warmest and best quality. A decent pair might cost you, but they will last a lifetime and you’ll never regret it!

“It is both delusional and stupid to think that clothes don’t really matter and we should all wear whatever we want. Most people don’t take clothing seriously enough, but whether we should or not, clothes do talk to us and we make decisions based on people’s appearances.”
– G. Bruce Boyer

Quick Aside:  One more comment on Santa-Con.  Since I seem to give out a lot of age limits on this forum, I would like to note that you should not be participating in the Santa-Con festivities past the age of 25.  I know I am crushing some dreams here but it had to be said.

The Velcro Jungle

Photo Credit: raoco.net

Fashion mistakes can jump out at me at any given time, even when I least expect it.  I strolled down my block earlier this evening to get some dinner at one of my favorite take out places.  As I was waiting in line I noticed a rather handsome man standing in front of me.  Of course I could not say hi and turn on the flirt because I was not looking my best but that is a whole other story.  Just as I was admiring his chic leather shoes and crisp fall jacket, he pulled out of his pocket a…

VELCRO WALLET

My jaw dropped in disbelief.  What was this guy thinking?  His one fashion faux pas ruined my positive impression of him.  I swear I almost said something.  Doesn’t he have a girlfriend or a partner of some kind to show him the way?  And by show him the way I mean out of the Velcro jungle and into the grown up world of chic sophistication.  I was so amazed that he was sporting a Velcro wallet I didn’t even catch the design on it, but let’s face it, the design may as well of been Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.   Guys, please read carefully here.  If you are on a date or anywhere for that matter and you pull out a Velcro wallet you may as well be wearing a sign that says “my mom still does my laundry, I play World of Warcraft and I’ve never been laid.”  After the age of 10 you should never own a Velcro wallet again.  Even those corny yet durable Mighty Wallets are superior to a Velcro number.   My best suggestion if you are in the market for a new wallet is to get over to a Coach store.  I love their wallets and have given them as gifts to several of my boyfriends.  I promise you, the Coach wallet is a hit every time. To sum up what I am talking about with a pop culture video reference, watch this funny clip from Crazy Stupid Love.   

Quick Aside: My talented literary agent emailed me an article today written about men’s “Must Haves” for fall. It is definitely worth a read so check it out at Refinery29.