Hit the Slopes!

Most people dread the cold weather, but I look forward to it every year.  The colder the better I always say!  Winter time brings hot cocoa, warm fireplaces, sexy coats and lots of time for indoor activities ;).  I try to get onto the slopes to ski every year to live out my inner-most Aspen Extreme fantasies! Most years I am unsuccessful not because I don’t have time but because I can’t find a friend who knows how/is willing/has time to take a ski vacation.  So for now I’ll just look out the window and feel the cold air on my face while imaging the snow crunching and swooshing beneath my skis.  Some might think that when it comes to skiing the rule of thumb is to just dress warm and try not to fall on your a**.  But you would be wrong.  You need to know what you are doing on the slopes and when dressing in your

SKI GEAR

My jealousy was kicked into high gear Sunday morning when I was having brunch with my lawyer.  She was planning a ski trip and considering what to wear on the slopes.  I got to thinking about men and their ski attire.  Of course you need the basics: warm thick socks, snow pants, water proof ski gloves, a winter coat/ski coat, something to keep your neck warm, goggles and a hat.  Although we always strive to look sexy, the slopes are not the place for men to wear anything too tight.  For you skiers out there, you know that you sometimes need different parts of your body to move fast while making split second decisions.  Any restricting clothing can hinder you, and as much as you may not want to admit it, even the best of athletes fall down sometimes. So, everything you wear should be waterproof, warm and roomy.  As far as your coat, snow pants and gloves; Spyder and North Face are pretty reliable brands.  For goggles most men like Oakley’s or Smith’s.  WARNING: do not think for one second that you can just wear your sexy sunglasses or no eye gear at all.  Most people, myself included, learned this lesson the hard way. Less than half way down even at a moderate speed that wind will tear up your eyes so fast you won’t know what hit you. At that point you won’t be able to see and are putting yourself and other skiers in danger.  Please trust me; you must wear goggles even on the bunny slope.  Choose your ski gear according to your personality, get over to a quality ski shop and try lots of different pieces on and listen to the sales people.  Ski gear can be expensive so choose wisely and make sure you are going to like it for years to come.  (Quick tip:do not buy anything at the ski mountain gift shop, they mark it up tremendously) If you live in the New York City Area, it is worth the subway ride to

Photo Credit: http://www.sacbee.com

Photo Credit: http://www.sacbee.com

Brooklyn to check out Panda Ski & Sport, otherwise take a trip over to your local Ski Barn or Sports Authority. A lot of people like to take this opportunity to wear bright colors and really goofy hats.  Colors are great and hats are wonderfully expressive but you do not want to look like a box of highlighters or an escaped mental patient sliding down the hill… like I said choose wisely.

“Using your ski jacket with its zipper-dangling pass for a night out on the town is a downhill disaster.”

A Decent Pair

Photo Credit: www.etsy.com

Photo Credit: http://www.etsy.com

Some people get freaked out by midgets, or creeps that follow you around in Macy’s or oddly long toes, etc. We all have things that give us the creeps! I realized on Saturday night that the tradition of Santa-con scares the s**t out of me.  I am so terrified of all those weird Santas, awkward elves, and life size dradles walking around New York City.  I had the unfortunate experience of going out Saturday night and socializing amongst all of these Santas.  The Santas were wackos yet the night was fun.  We went to Ace Bar in Alphabet City.  Not the classiest joint I have ever stepped foot in but it was good enough I suppose.  While I was there I got to thinking about how men can go many different directions with winter accessories.  And I could write forever about said directions, but today I want to discuss

MITTENS ON MEN

Well, I am sure you know what is coming next.  Attention all men: NEVER wear mittens.  This is not an “if and or but” subject.  The answer is always no after the age of 8 unless you work at the North Pole making toys all year long.  It does not matter if you are making your way down the slopes, building a snowman with junior, or if your 13 year old niece  Zoe made you mittens in her home economics class, the answer is always no!  If you are a grown man who wears mittens you may as well have a sign hanging from your neck that says, “My mommy breast-fed me way too long, I still suck my thumb at night in secret, my three cats are my best friends, I’m a virgin and I wear a onesie every night to bed.” (Stay tuned for a post about grown men wearing onesies)  There are just some aspects of fashion that you can’t make work.  Plus, like I always write you wouldn’t want to run into your boss, crush or future in-laws wearing mittens would you?  Every grown man who lives in a climate where the temperature will drop below 50 at some point during the year should own at least one pair of decent leather gloves.  So, if you do not, then get yourself over to a Cole Haan, Coach, or even an Eddie Bauer for crying out loud and pick yourself up a pair.  Try and purchase a pair with a cashmere lining, they are the warmest and best quality. A decent pair might cost you, but they will last a lifetime and you’ll never regret it!

“It is both delusional and stupid to think that clothes don’t really matter and we should all wear whatever we want. Most people don’t take clothing seriously enough, but whether we should or not, clothes do talk to us and we make decisions based on people’s appearances.”
– G. Bruce Boyer

Quick Aside:  One more comment on Santa-Con.  Since I seem to give out a lot of age limits on this forum, I would like to note that you should not be participating in the Santa-Con festivities past the age of 25.  I know I am crushing some dreams here but it had to be said.