2012 in Review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

600 people reached the top of Mt. Everest in 2012. This blog got about 2,500 views in 2012. If every person who reached the top of Mt. Everest viewed this blog, it would have taken 4 years to get that many views.

Click here to see the complete report.

Out With the Old

wire-hangersHello everyone!  I must begin by apologizing for being absent for so long.  It was a hectic holiday season but I am back on track.  Thank you all for being loyal readers during my blogging career thus far. Every one loves the idea of a fresh start and I have always believed that it is never too late to start over.  So today I would like to suggest to all the men out there some fashion related

NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS

Now is the time to let go and leave behind all of our reckless wardrobe blunders and look towards more stylish days ahead.  First and foremost, you must take some time to access every piece of your clothing and I mean everything.  Look through all garments from socks to formal wear.  Get out a box for donation and get rid of anything that:

·        Does not fit (ie. items you promised yourself last year would fit you after you lost all the holiday weight)

·        Is ripped, torn, stained, stretched out, too faded, etc. (even old ratty gym clothes need to be replaced every once in a while)

·        Was a mistake to purchase in the first place (we all have impulse purchases)

·        A gift someone gave you that you’ll never wear (Thanks Aunt Lulu for this cool authentic suede vest with fringe, I can’t wait to wear it….NOT!)

·        You have not worn in the last year and never will (be honest with yourself)

·        Reminds you of your ex like a crappy old T-shirt they gave you (*exception unless the item is super stylish, expensive, and/or irreplaceable like a nice winter coat, and classy pair of gloves, or a fancy leather wallet, some items are timeless and never worth giving up!)

·        You bought for a specific occasion that never happened. (I guess that Cowboys and Indians theme party is not going to be rescheduled?)

·        You thought would look fabulous and you wore it once and then it looked horrible on. (ie. Some items look magnificent on the hanger but we must try on at all times before purchase…golden rule, don’t fight it)

·        Hand-me-downs that never quite made it onto your body (I loved my late uncle Earl but I really just don’t see myself wearing his purple velvet leisure suit that he left me)

how-to-design-a-mans-closet-1You must make room now in your attire for the fresh and new.  Get rid of the crap and clear the space for the fabulous!  Make sure to gather all your gift cards from the holiday and those you may have received throughout the year but did not have a chance to use. (Some gifts cards have expiration dates so be sure to use them!) January is one of the best if not the best time to shop.  All of the stores have the biggest sales and you can make outstanding purchases at a great price.  Take inventory of all the gifts you got over the holidays that you want to exchange. Don’t worry about hurting Aunt Peggy’s feelings, she will probably never notice.  Exchange that ugly sweater for something you really want and will wear. If you keep the ugly sweater to be diplomatic and never wear it, that is a fashion crime.  And while you are tossing things out, get rid of all wire hangers.  They are also a crime.

“Looking good isn’t self importance; it’s self respect.” ~Charles Hix

T-Shirt Time

Last night was a real Midtown, Manhattan, bar hopping kind of night.  Holiday drinks with some of my best looking college friends started out at The Glass House Tavern, and then we headed to Hurley’s and ended the night at a hip joint I had never been to before called Lillie’s.  I was so busy tossing back cocktails and having fun that while on my way home I realized that I missed the last episode ever of Jersey Shore.  I know, I know most people would call Jersey Shore trash television but for me it is like a train wreck that you can’t look away from.  I was hooked after the first episode. (as were a lot of people)   I mostly tune in for the guy candy and all of the funny catch phrases.  In honor of the last episode I wanted to dedicated this post to the topic of men who wear

T-SHIRTS ALL THE TIME

Look, I know for men t-shirts are comfortable and sometimes even flattering.  But if you are one of these men who take the phrase “T-shirt time” way too seriously, you are in trouble.  Sadly, I have known men in my time who wear a t-shirt no matter the occasion.  This is a fashion offense of epic proportions.  T-shirts have their place in the world but not every day of the week all year long.  You don’t want to be one of these guys who would wear a t-shirt to prom, or to a wedding, or to a cocktail party.  I am sorry but it just can’t happen.  You need to incorporate more sweaters, vests, polo shirts and of course button downs into your wardrobe.  You know you are in trouble if when people ask what are you planning on wearing and you respond with

Photo Credit: www.fanpop.com

Photo Credit: http://www.fanpop.com

“My best T-shirt” or if you look into your closet right now and you have all your T-shirts lined up on hangers…gross.  I suppose for every rule there is an exception, so here it is.  If you are a man who has, a body like Mike “The Situation”, AND a smile like Pauly D, AND a laugh like Ronnie, AND the boyish charm of Vinny then you can wear whatever you want!   Otherwise clean up your act.

“Looking good and dressing well is a necessity. Having a purpose in life is not.”
– Oscar Wilde

Lasting Impressions

Personally, Holidays are not for me.  I am not much of a birthday/anniversary person either but that is a story for another day. Anyone who knows me will tell you that I am not one for tradition and definitely not what one might call traditional. I just can’t stand forced celebration and mandatory gatherings.  The whole thing stresses me out.  I always just want to stay home alone in my apartment and hide under the covers during holidays, but like most people I feel a sense of obligation and often wind up going to a family member’s home so that I can roll my eyes and hope the meal goes quickly and painlessly.  So, here I present the sometimes controversial topic of…

HOLIDAY ATTIRE

I have been to many holiday meals in my day and people treat holidays differently from family to family.  The thing is guys; you have to get dressed on the holidays.  Some men feel that if they are the ones hosting the holiday they are allowed to dress down, and they are dead wrong.  If you are hosting a holiday gathering you should be the best dressed one there.  Over the years many men have told me, “I just want to wear sweats and watch football.”  This is so barbaric to me and absolutely not sexy.  As much as we want to treat holidays like any other Sunday afternoon, we can’t.  So do not just toss on an outfit from the hamper that you would wear on any Sunday afternoon.  A lot of men like to wear softer pants so that there is room for more food.  Gross! Wear normal pants and don’t eat like a pig! At the very minimum, (and I really mean minimum) you should wear a fitted sleek polo shirt and your nicest pair of jeans.  Holidays are not the time for sweats, T-shirts, and white socks.  So don’t be such a lazy piece of shit and get dressed.  For some people the holidays are the only time of year that they see family.  Make a good impression that will last all year.

Quick Aside:  Holidays are not the time to be fashionably experimental.  You don’t want people saying for years to come, “Remember that Thanksgiving years ago when cousin Joey wore that outfit that made him look like he owned a chocolate factory…hahahahahaha”  Families have a way of reminding you of your most embarrassing moments and poorest choices… FOREVER, so don’t give them any ammunition.

Keep it Clean

There’s nothing like a good sex shop. I’ve been to my fair share over the years and today I combined two of my favorite things and found myself at The Museum of Sex on lower 5th Avenue in Manhattan. The Museum itself is informative and entertaining. Of course one of the best parts is the gift shop. While perusing the store my eyes feasted on an array of items such as dirty Mad Libs, vibrators, condom lollipops and books on the history of pornography. As I arrived at the clothing section I began to think about…

VULGAR CLOTHING

Don’t get me wrong here, during my undergraduate and graduate school days I certainly wrote several papers on first amendment rights as well as my disagreement with censorship. I believe that all people have the right to express themselves. However, while no one should be told what they can and can not wear by law we all need to exercise a little discretion now and then. People who know me will say that I wear my make up like a transvestite, curse like a sailor and have done all kinds of things that have been deemed “out of line.” But I make a point not to wear my bad habits. Even so, I do not believe that anyone should wear clothing with vulgar, obscene or overly sexual images on them. I have seen a lot of this in my day and feel it is quite gauche. You never know if there are kids around who can see you, if you are about to run into your boss or worse; your crush. Not to mention you might really upset or offend someone. Oftentimes I see teenagers with t-shirts that have crude language on them and I want to approach them and ask how their parents let them go out of the house that way. Take it from me; you will never make a good impression (first or otherwise) wearing something with crude and/or inappropriate imagery or text on it. So next time you are browsing in Hot Topic or another alternative type store, stop yourself from reaching for a shirt that says, “10 cent Mustache Rides”, “I Fu**ed a Midget, “Proud Necrophiliac” or anything similar with a distasteful design. When it comes to the topics discussed/illustrated on your clothing, do yourself a favor and keep it clean.

An Interesting Conversation Piece

Photo Credit: SoSews.com

When we are young it seems every occasion merits a T-shirt.  Now in my late 20’s I am amazed when I see my peers still wearing our elementary school class of 95’ T-shirts.  I know it is difficult to throw them away.  Sentimental value is powerful.  Some people just can’t let go of their T-shirts that say “Mazel Tov: Scott’s Bar Mitzvah”, “Gallagher Clan Family Reunion”, or “I got laid in Hawaii: Spring Break ‘04”  Personally I hate novelty T-shirts, but I can understand the appeal.   Before we go any further, I need to stress my position on this topic, do not wear these T-shirts.  Although they have value in your eyes, you will look like an immature fool who can’t grow up if you wear them. So the question for today is, what we do with all of the….

SENTIMENTAL T-SHIRTS WE’LL NEVER WEAR AGAIN

One of the coolest guys I know I met in college.  We didn’t have superlatives but if we did he would have been voted most popular.  If there was an organization on campus, most likely he was a member.  Student council, fraternity, orientation leader, I even saw him at a meeting of the clay club I went to.  Needless to say he collected a lot of T-shirts over the years.  One day I found myself in his dorm room and I was shocked to see on his bed an entire quilt made out of his old T-shirts.  It was amazing.  All of the cool, funny T-shirts he had collected over the years were in this quilt all sewn together to make an awesome blanket and of course an interesting conversation piece.  Please do not get me wrong, I feel most T-shirts like the ones I mentioned belong in the donation bin, but if you just can’t let them go, give your Nana a call and tell her to dust off the old sewing machine and to organize a reunion of the quilting bee because you have a project for her.

Underwear or Outerwear

Everywhere I go I take mental notes about what men are wearing.  Today I had a blast at the U.S. Open and was bombarded with a plethora of material.  Most everyone looked the best they could considering the scorching heat.  Although I am someone who is usually rather decisive there is still one question I continue to ask myself time and time again.  As I witnessed many men doing today I wonder; Is it OK or a fashion faux pas when men wear…

UNDERSHIRTS AS SHIRTS

My initial instincts tell me no.  However, after further examination I feel that men wearing white undershirts as shirts are allowed under very specific conditions.  I hope that it goes without saying that this look is very casual, never to be worn at night, on a date, or anywhere of major importance.  At the same time, if you are going to rock the “white undershirt as your shirt” look you have to be physically fit.  I do not mean to be cruel but if you are out of shape or overweight and you try and sport this style, it will only make you look worse.  Please note that white undershirts are extremely sensitive and subject to pit stains.  If the shirt is white and the arms pits are looking a little too run down it is time to toss that shirt in the trash.  Before the weather cools down give this look a try.  If you feel and look as cool as James Dean then you are one of the few who can get away with wearing underwear as outerwear, just don’t lie to yourself as it is not for every man.

Quick Aside: Check out this recent New York Times article about Men, Shopping & Fashion.